the butterfly effect

the butterfly effect -- this piece was inspired by a motivational article i read in en email newsletter, but i was amazed at the impact that understanding this mathematical theory made on my life as a whole. when i was considering whether i wanted to bother with a relationship or not and what i was willing to give up and/or sacrifice to have a relationship, i really wondered whether i was the kind of person cut out to actually love someone else who was not my child or a part of my family. for those people, i would give up my life w/o a moment's hesitation. for other people, well -- i don't think so.

i decided that IF i was going to be involved in another relationship, i was going into it expecting to give 100% and to receive 100%. i wanted love, respect, consideration (for myself and my children), etc., and was prepared to offer those same things to someone else. i've always known that it was often the little things that hurt people's feelings and/or caused relationship of all kinds to go sour, but reading and pondering this theory really drove that point home to me.

after all -- if it's just 1 little thing that caused a huge issue and that could've been avoided by being more aware, being more careful, being more considerate, and/or being more loving -- wouldn't it just be better to prevent those situations while they were still small? that's how i truly feel, too, as i know that each day when i see someone or speak to someone, that might be the last time that we ever talk. when parents watch their child walk out the door -- that might be the last time that child ever comes home safely. when spouses leave for work in the morning, anything in the world could happen that day.

since my son's car wreck in 2002, i am even more aware of how precious life is and how special the people in my life are to me. i never want to live with the idea that the last meeting and/or conversation that i had w/ someone i love was filled w/ anger, harsh words, and/or hurtful actions. so now i am even more conscious that "it's the little things that make the differences in life. the little things can constantly convey how much you love someone or the little things can let other people know how little that you care."

i drew the butterfly on the comp book page w/ black sharpie marker and prang colored pencils. then i decided that i wanted a bolder background that i was probably willing to apply to the page, so i decided to go w/ plants on decorative paper. i used an exacto knife to cut around the top and sides of the butterfly body and left it fully connected to the page by the underside of the body. i measured the decorative papger and cut a slit in the page that matched the shape of the butterfly's underbody. by putting the decorative page on top of the butterfly and then pulling the butterfly's wing up thru the slit, i was able to make the butterfly be on top of the greenery even though i did the butterfly first on the page.

i used mod podge to glue the decorative paper down to the background area of the comp book page and then to glue the butterfly's wing down on top of the greenery. after the pages dried, i went back w/ a black sharpie marker and penned in legs, antennae and the working -- "The Butterfly Effect . . . can the flap of a butterfly's wings in Brazil cause a tornado in Texas?" around the shape of the butterfly and then "It truly is the little things that matter." across the bottom of the page.

if you want to read the article about the butterfly effect, you can find it here --> http://wentupthehill.blogspot.com/2006/01/its-little-things-that-matter.html . that blog is where i keep about 60 or so stories that i've written about my life and/or my thoughts on those events. i need to get back to that more, but i've been too busy making art now!